Thanks ladies for all the wonderful comments. They always do my weary heart good. I will update you on the specifics with the Dr. tomorrow. As this is my 100th post, I prefer write about what is on my heart.
Matthew 11: 28 - 30 says, Come to me all of you who are tired and have heavy loads, and I will give you rest. Accept my teachings and learn from me, because I am gentle and humble in spirit, and you will find rest for your lives. (New Century Version
The King James version states, Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
How easy it seems to just give it all to him, to cast our burdens at his feet and let him carry the weight. It is easy to say, but tough to do. I say to my dh all the time, "I am not going to worry about it, I am leaving it in God's hands", but I never do. I still dwell on the what ifs, consult Mr. Google, and wrack my brain trying to "figure it out". I over analyze and worry about the future. I even worry about things I have no business worrying about.
It is like going to the grocery store and having to carry all the grocery bags up 6 flight of stairs - it is exhausting physically. By the time you get to the 4th floor, you are out of breath, your body is weak, and you are sweating profusely. You feel the tension in your neck and the pain of carrying the bags in the palms of your hands. This is how it feels to bear the burden alone.
The scripture reminds us that we are not supposed to carry the burden on our own, we are supposed to cast them on him. Like I said, easier said than done.
Well tonight, I am tired of carrying the load. I am tired and pained mentally and physically. I have tension and experience anxiety. I keep thinking of the future and my views are not always positive.
As women, our natural instinct is to solve the problem, and the results affect us more than they do our male counterparts. When we can't solve them, we push even further and search harder to find a solution that is acceptable to us. Tonight, I am making a commitment to cast my cares on him. You know what? I really am not going to worry anymore. If anything is for me, then it will come in time. I want to let go of the tension and the physical pain. I am casting my cares on him because I want my yoke to be easy, and my burden to be light.
I will no longer be obsessed with finding a solution to every problem I encounter, I will simply pray about it and leave it at the altar.
Where is my expected end?