Standardized testing that is, also knows as the Flo.rida Comp.rehensive Assess.ment Test. That is what kept me away from blogverse this past week. I have quickly read your blogs via my hubby's phone, so please forgive me if I have not commented!
It is over and now "real" teaching begins :-). Many of the teachers hate to admit it, but to some degree we do teach to the test. After years of teaching, we know what normally appears on the test, and we focus mostly on those concepts. Thank heavens that's over!
I have yet to post about the new give away or purchase the winner's prize (its on its way Cecilia!). I will get to that tomorrow after work. I am in the process of doing lesson plans, so this post will be brief. Just a few snippets from the past week and a half.
******Bar.bara from Dr. Char.les' office called me. What for you might ask? To reschedule my surgery! In a very polite tone (yea right) I asked, "is your memory failing? Did you forget the things you said to me? If you were the last office on earth to do the TAC, I would remain childless! I am blessing someone else with my business." She wished me a good day and hung up. The wretch! She knows she was wrong and I hope they get exposed.
***** My consultation with the Dr in Gainseville, Fl (5 hours away) is scheduled for March 29th! Please, please, please, keep me in your prayers that I get some direction as to what to do next.
******My friend Alyson is pregnant!!!! (squealing and doing the happy dance).. It did my heart good to hear this news. Please keep her in your prayers. She has another beta tomorrow. I am hoping for twins :-). Hey, if i can't love on my own, i might as well love on others right? Please stop by her blog and send her congrats.
*******I had a brief moment of insanity one night. I mentioned to hubby, lets just get pregnant and play it by ear. The next morning I woke up, I realized what I had said. It would be so irresponsible to get pregnant without the TAC or at least without a plan in place. I would never forgive myself for doing that if something happened. Thank God that clarity comes in the morning!
******* two wonderful blog posts spoke to me over the past few days. Here and here. The Lord really knows when to show up and speak to you in the unlikeliest of places. We often expect to hear from him in a way that we are used to (through prayer, through someone we know, through the ministers word, etc.), but he always "flips the script" and shows up in a way we don't expect. When he does show up in the unlikeliest places, we are taken aback and have no doubt that he is speaking.
He speaks through the grief of others and the revelations they have. I was really down and as usual, despairing because I am not in control. I am having a hard time finding someone locally to do the TAC, and I keep feeling as if I am finding dead ends. These two posts revealed to me that I took the control from him and am trying to do things myself. Just like when Peter stepped out of the boat. For a minute, he doubted God's ability and power , and he began to sink. Peter screamed "save me Lord!' and Jesus said,"Ye of little faith. Why do you doubt me?" (Thanks for reminding me of this Katy!).
No matter what I am going through, or how bleak the situation seems, I cannot take my eyes of him or doubt his ability for one minute. He is in control and I must let go of my control so that his will will be done. I am giving the worry to him.
Ladies, thanks for the prayers, the support, the words of encouragement, and for allowing God to use you all to speak to me. You may not realize, but every little comment you all make is orchestrated by God to remind me that he still loves me. That he sends others to lift me up when I am weak. That he still desires good for me.
I am encouraged tonight and am comforted by the words of this old hymn.
No matter what storm clouds may rock this ship of mine.
The eyes of my savor will lead me safely trough the night.
Though my ship may be rocking,
And my sails may be torn.
I WILL rest, in the eye of the storm.
In a hurricane (and we get many of those in Florida), the eye if the hurricane is where peace and stillness dwells. In fact, news reports let us know that people get hurt because when the eye passes over, they think the worst has passed. They see the blue skies, the gentle wind, and the peace that settles. This is where I will rest. The worst of the storm has passed - I lost two precious babies - and I am sure many more storms will come. But for now, I am resting in the eye of the storm which is His bosom.
Awaiting my expected end.