Dear pregnant woman on the treadmill,
It's so nice to see you sprinting, trying to not gain that extra much needed pound. I see you every night busting your butt, trying to reject the few little pudges that are forming.
Just letting you know that I would die for that so count your blessings, go home, put your feet up, and welcome the fat.
Dear teacher at work,
Please stop moaning and groaning about the aches and pains you feel. Please try to refrain from telling me you cant sleep at night and how you get up "a million" times a night to pee.
Just know that I would die for that. So count your blessings and shut the heck up.
Dear youngster at church,
Please stop rejecting the option to buy maternity clothes. Trust me. They are not expensive. No one is telling you to buy Gucc.i and Pra.da. Take yourself to R.oss, Wal.mart, T.J Ma.xx or Targ.et. No one wants to see your poor belly fighting with your extra tight shirt for air/space. Oh, and please don't lament to everyone that comes within five feet that you are "so fat"!
Just know I would die for that. So count your blessings and embrace the wonders of pregnancy.
Dear pregnant (neither of you work) woman at church,
It must be nice to prounce around in 4 inch heels. It must be nice to walk around naive. If someone lovingly suggest that you lower the inches, don't attack them. Don't then go around retelling the tale and calling them "know it alls".
Just know I would die for that. So smile, shut up, and move on.
Dear pregnant women everywhere I go (and you are everywhere!)
How nice it must be to buy your crib at 13 weeks. When the rest of us are afraid to buy anything until after the baby is born.
I would die for that.
Dear pregnant SIL,
Why is it that you get to have 5 kids? Why is it that we have to struggle to hold onto 1? Please stop passing on advice because your womb is fruitful and ours are not. Please don't let me feel guilty because I cannot give your big brother babies.
I would die to give him babies.
Dear pregnant woman strutting your stuff,
Count your blessings. Don't take offense when I turn away or cross the street. I do not do it to be mean. It is just that my heart cannot take seeing you and be reminded of what I had. I am simply protecting my broken heart and fragile state of mind. I fear if I come near you, I might break down and be carted off to the psych ward.
Continue enjoying your naivete. I would die for It.
Oh, and that big bump in front of you? I would die for that too. That look of wonder on your husband's face? I would die for that too.
Awaiting my expected end.