Sunday, January 25, 2009

Nervous, yet excited.

Today is CD 13. I am so ready to ovulate. Dh and I have timed our fertile days and are doing all we can to ensure that this happenes. I know you cannot plan pregnancies, but we have been trying to plan this one, because we want children so much. Funny, you never know how much you want something until you lose it. I guess the old adage rings true.

I am exctied, yet nervous. What if it does not happen?? What if it does?? When should I contact the doc??? Should I wait till week 6?? Or call right away? What if it is a chemical preg? Or a blighted ovum?? Will I be able to endure a m/c? Is my body even ready?? Will the doc be mad b/c we did not wait for another period? Am I putting myself and a baby more at risk? I am getting waaaayyyyy ahead of myself, but this is what I have become. I have faith and trust God, but the human side of us, still asks these questions. I know, I know, I know, that I should not worry about these things, but take them one day at a time, or that is at least what my friend Toya tells me. She is going through the same thing. She had her cerclage and had a scare this weekend, which made me even more nervous.

We will see what the 2 week wait holds. On CD 25 I can test, and we will take it from there.

Still awaiting my expected end.

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